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Friday January 13th 2006
[We cut into the national French arena as the fans have risen to their feet and hold up signs, a lot of them sprawled in French, of course. They leap up and down excitedly as the anticipated show begins, and their big chance to appear on historic television has arrived. They thrust their signs into the air, trying their hardest to get them onto the camera. The director picks out the best, “J'adore Tequila!”, “Aphrodite Is Queen!” and “America Fears France!” are just a select few from a patroitic crowd. We pan around the audience once more before we cut to JLT and Leah at ringside.]
JLT: Hello everyone and welcome to another edition of Exile! We’re coming to live from the most romantic city in the world in the heart of France, Paris! We have a fabulous show lined up to you tonight which I can't wait for! I’m JLT, as always and I bet the French fans will be on the edges of their seats all night, right Leah?
Leah: Yes, probably from each other's stench of onions and vileness.
JLT: Those are just stereotypes, Leah. We’ve got a whole range of fabulous matches tonight. None more important than our main event which sees three Divas Unleashed champions battle it out in the centre of the ring! Dame Barbara, Icenique and the Unibrow will fight in an elimination triple-threat to find out who really is the most dominate champion in DU! I'm so excited!
Leah: Okay, calm down otherwise you'll burst a blood vessel. We also have the nutcase Chimera taking on Katia's friend and manager in singles action as she wrestles Livia! Let's remember that Livia is not a trained wrestler, she's just there to carry the Fabulous One's bags! I predict this match will be over pretty quickly, Chimera will own her!
JLT: The hometown girl, Aphrodite will team with Sexy Amanda to take on the reformed Occult! Aphrodite will have her own crowd of Paris behind her, cheering her on as she takes on the monsterous tag team, plus with Amanda's speech last week, will she even want to be tagging with the former model? It seems Amanda has gone all selfish all of a sudden!
Leah: Probably PMS. We also have Courtney and Carley Monroe teaming together once again as 'Blonde Ambition' in a handicap match against Noriko Lee! Noriko is armed with her kendo stick and Ryoko Kazami, so Blonde Ambition will have to work hard to beat her! They could also find a match strategy but they're probably too dumb!
JLT: Blonde Ambition certainly won't be getting honourary degrees from Harvard!
Leah: Harvard is so overrated anyway, Adelphi is where it's at!
JLT: Indeed!
Tag Team Match
[The Occult come to the ring and look ready for action. Sexy Amanda comes to the ring and announces that she refuses to participate in this match and that the management should listen to her demands otherwise someone will have to pay. Aphrodite fights the match alone with Amanda joining the commentary booth, and talks about how she should be the next big thing and the next megastar in Divas Unleashed.]
[The Occult nail a double spinebuster and cover for a two count. Aphrodite fights back, delivering an “Aphrodite” chick kick to Katrina and sending her out of the ring. On the outside of the ring, Kristin Wallace and Ruby get into a catfight and roll around on the outside. Aphrodite places Katrina on the top rope for a “Beauty Treatment” top rope RKO finisher. Katrina counters and shoves Aphrodite forward, into the hands of Lilith who nails her “Hellish Nightmares” powerbomb finisher. Katrina covers but gets a 2 count.]
[Aphrodite manages to send Katrina flying over the ropes into the managers on the outside, Aphrodite then kicks the monster Lilith in the mid-section but Lilith bounces to the ropes. Aphrodite nails an “Aphrodite Kick” sending Lilith to the canvas and pins for the 3 count.]
Winners – Aphrodite & Sexy Amanda
[After the match, Amanda shoves Ruby into the ringpost and then climbs into the ring and spears down Aphrodite. She begins to beat her down as the Occult leave ringside. Amanda pulls Aphrodite into her “Bytch Tamer” submission as Aphrodite taps on the canvas. Amanda is relentless and doesn’t give up before she’s finally pulled off, she then leaves ringside in a hurry as Aphrodite looks injured.]
[“Faint” by Linkin Park hits the PA system as the fans give a mixed reaction. Shane Rockford walks out onto the stage, dressed in a slick business suit with his blonde-brown mesh hair gelled up. At his side stands Tequila, dressed in a hugging white dress and the two newly-designed DU Tag Team Championships on either of her shoulders. She smiles at the belts and takes a twirl. The couple head to the ring, with Shane helping Tequila in by sitting on the ropes.]
[Shane walks to the center of the ring as Tequila skips to the ropes and holds up the belts in the air and smiles. Shane then pauses for his music to be cut before he brings the microphone into his lips, he smiles at his girlfriend as Tequila stands next to him.]
Shane Rockford: Good evening Paris! It’s great to be here tonight in this fine city, the people are friendly, the food is divine and the women are beautiful! That aside, I have a big announcement to make tonight. You see, Sexy Amanda has now decided that she’s going to try and become a rebel, she’s going to try and throw her weight around and demand that she gets what she wants. That little hissy fit included her vacating the tag team championships.
Shane Rockford: So, we have no tag champions right now. That’s why I’m launching the 2006 Tag Team Tournament! The two finalists will face off at Nuclear Pussy III for the newly-designed gold my lovely assistant is modeling to my left.
[Tequila smiles and sways the belts on her shoulders.]
Shane Rockford: Anybody can enter into this tournament and the tournament will start with the first batch of matches on Exile next week! Even champions can enter this tournament, we’re not having any restrictions on the participants, and I hope that we can find some interesting pairings out of this!
Shane Rockford: Also I have an announcement regarding our next Exile, as next week we will have a match to determine the number 1 contender for the Unleashed Championship! Enjoy the rest of your night!
[Shane Rockford then smiles to the crowd as Tequila twirls once again with the new titles and follows Shane out of the ring with a smile on her face. The duo head up at the ramp together as “Faint” by Linkin Park plays. We cut to the announce table.]
JLT: Wow! A Tag Tournament!
Leah: Yes, it should be interesting, all to climax at NP3, how appropriate! It starts next week, where we’ll also have a match to determine the Unleashed contender!
JLT: How exciting!
Tag Team Match
[Blonde Ambition spend the first two minutes of the match posing, prompting to Noriko to hit Carley over the back of the head with the Singapore cane before the bell rings. Noriko then whips Courtney to the ropes and nails a Fujiwara armbar. Noriko then heads to the top rope and nails a hurricanrana into a pin. Courtney kicks out. Courtney fights back after nailing a few clothesline and then a stiff DDT before she tags in Carley.]
[Carley, after posing, heads to the top rope and leaps off with a moonsault to Noriko but Noriko kicks out of the cover attempt. Noriko and Carley then tie up in the corner with Noriko putting Carley on the top rope but Courtney comes into the ring and picks Noriko up on her shoulders. Carley leaps with a clothesline and the duo nail a ‘doomsday device’ style move. Carley then covers for the victory.]
Winners – Blonde Ambition
[Blonde Ambition celebrate in the ring and pose for the fans. Noriko gets back to her feet and hits the duo across the back with her Singapore cane. Noriko then beats down both divas with the kendo stick before leaving with Ryoko, a satisfied smile on her face. Carley and Courtney are tended to by medics in the ring.]
[We cut backstage to see Katrina and Lilith on either side of Holly Wentz, who smiles sheepishly. She’s wearing a smart business suit and a white smile. The Occult are wearing their ring attire, Katrina’s black catsuit and Lilith’s black gown. Holly brings the microphone to her lips.]
Holly Wentz: I’m backstage with the Occult. You lost earlier tonight thanks to Aphrodite but you apparently request this interview, what’s that about?
Lilith: Well we wanted to officially announce that we’ll both be in the tag tournament and that we will win and be the next champions!
Katrina: That’s right, Amanda thinks she is the queen of the tag division but it’s me. I’ve been in more successful tag teams than anyone else, we’ll easily win.
Holly Wentz: Well that’s good. So you seemed to work pretty well together earlier tonight, have you been practicing some new moves?
Katrina: Well we’ve been training together. We wanted to make sure we’re a capable tag team and prove to people that the Occult should be feared.
Holly Wentz: Now Katrina, is there any truth to the rumours that you’re getting divorced?
Katrina: Yes, I am getting divorced from Shane but I’d rather not talk about it right now. I’m trying to keep my personal life and my work separate.
Holly Wentz: Okay, cool, now what ar-
[Before Holly can continue, Bloo and Jinx have blindsided the Occult and knocked the journalist over. Jinx and Bloo begin to stomp on Lilith as Katrina finds her feet. She spears Jinx into the interview set as the two teams brawl backstage. Trixie then heads Katrina over the back of the head with a microphone, sending her down to the canvas. Bloo and Jinx then give a stern look as they walk away.]
JLT: Bloo and Jinx have been attacking everyone recently! They must really want to win this tournament!
Leah: Yes, or maybe they’re just expressing their anger at society’s repression of their sexuality causing them great sociological battles against the refusal to widen democracy?
JLT: Wow, you may have a point!
Standard Match
[A frightened Livia comes to the ring dressed in a mimic of Katia’s wrestling attire but in red. She steps into the ring as Chimera immediately tears her head off with a harsh clothesline as Katia stands at ringside. Chimera nails her “Desolation” and “Crimson Hands” signature moves, she goes to cover Livia but pulls her up before the referee can reach three, teasing the manageress.]
[Chimera nails an “Angelic Angst” modified widow’s peak onto Livia. Chimera then pulls her up to nail the finisher once again before covering her, Katia stands on the apron and distracts the referee. Chimera then brings Livia to her feet by hair, she shoves Livia’s unconscious face into Katia and points to her as a message. Katia then nails Chimera across the head with the Rockford State championship belt. Katia then nails Livia across the head as Livia falls backwards onto Chimera’s body into a pinfall for the 1, 2, 3.]
Winner – Livia
[After the match Katia climbs into the ring and helps her manager. Chimera then hops up to her feet and runs at Katia but Chimera nails her hard across the head with her championship belt once again. Katia then steps over Chimera and shouts in her face that the belt is and will always be hers. Katia then drags the limp Livia to the back as Katia celebrates the victory and poses to the fans.]
[We cut backstage to see Amaryllis Vasquez sitting on a leather sofa with the Unleashed Championship laying in her lap. She winches as Chester McNugget giggles and applauds at an episode of Teletubbies on the television set. Mystika and Icenique stand talking in the middle of the room, Mystika then leaves and heads to the bathroom as Amaryllis stands and approaches her client.]
Amaryllis Vasquez: You’re not, really, thinking of teaming with her in the tournament are you?
Icenique: Yeah, why?
Amaryllis Vasquez: I don’t know Ice, it seems that it would do more harm than good. I mean, I am your manager so I need to advise you. This is going to harm your career.
Icenique: How, by being a double champion?
Amaryllis Vasquez: Well why do you want to spend time in this tournament and defending your Unleashed title to? This is an important year, you need that Unleashed belt around your waist.
Icenique: Well, I want to team with my friend and that’s that. I don’t care if we don’t win, I just want to do this with her.
[Amaryllis rolls her eyes and snarls her face. Icenique scowls.]
Icenique: What?
Amaryllis Vasquez: Oh nothing. I just heard that, well, she was saying some rather nasty things about you earlier. She was saying that she was just using you and that you’re a dumb bitch and that you’re selfish…
[Icenique scowls and looks toward the bathroom as Mystika walks out with a smile on her face, Icenique turns back to her manager who shrugs and offers a sympathetic smile.]
Amaryllis Vasquez: Forget I said anything.
[Amaryllis goes and takes a seat next to Chester as Icenique turns to Mystika and executes a false smile as Mystika begins to talk to her again. Amaryllis shoots them a glance as we cut to ringside.]
JLT: Amaryllis looks like she’s trying to start something? Don’t you think?
Leah: Well she does have a point. People always like to bitch about us women with the big asses, everybody’s jealous of me and J-Lo!
JLT: I’m sure they are.
Triple Threat Elimination Match
[Icenique comes to the ring with Mystika and Amaryllis at her side, she immediately spears The Unibrow into the canvas and begins to nail her with a barrage of punches. Barbara pulls her off and whips her to the ropes, nailing a shoulder block and then a leg drop. The Unibrow comes from behind, nailing a patented school boy to the Dame but the Askai champion is able to roll out.]
[Barbara nails a mule kick to the Unibrow and tosses her out of the ring. She walks over to Icenique who nails a “Death By Design” flatliner finisher and covers but Barbara gets her foot on the bottom rope. The Unibrow then leaps from the top rope with a double axe handle smash to the back of Icenique’s head sending her into the canvas. The Unibrow covers, with Barbara laying on the cover as well and holding the second rope. The referee counts to 3 and Icenique is eliminated.]
[Barbara smiles at being left alone with the inexperienced Stripped champion. Barbara dominates the limited Unibrow, and refuses to let the referee count to 3 until Barbara wants to. The Unibrow manages to fight back, nailing a piledriver to Barbara and then a running school boy finisher. Barbara manages to kick out and quickly nails her springboard RKO “My Fair Lady” for the three count.]
Winner – Dame Barbara
[Barbara then tosses the Unibrow out of the ring at the end and begins to celebrate with Shayla Walker. Sexy Amanda then comes to the ring armed with a chair and slams the chair across Shayla’s head, before turning to Barbara and laying her out in the centre of the ring. Amanda then points to herself as Exile fades off air.]
Brought to you by Rockstar Entertainments
Epilogue
Our show is a little shorter again mainly because of coursework, January is the worst month for it really but I should have it over and done with so next week's show will be much better! Thank you for reading!
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