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Friday March 24th 2006
[We cut into the Russian arena as the fans have risen to their feet and hold up signs. They leap up and down excitedly as the show begins, and their big chance to appear on historic television has arrived. They thrust their signs into the air, trying their hardest to get them onto the camera. The director picks out the best, “Russia Loves Wrestling!”, “In Soviet Russian, Diva Wrestles You!” and “Leah For President!” are just a select few. The audience are ecstatic. We pan around the audience once more before we cut to JLT and Leah at ringside.]
JLT: Hello everybody and welcome to the first Exile of 2006! We’re coming to live from the most glamourous place in the world, Monte Carlo! We have a fabulous show lined up to you tonight which shall set the tone for the entire year to come, I'm so excited! I’m JLT, and I’m joined as always by Leah!
Leah: Yes, never fear viewers. I didn't get fired like the internet rumours said. Honestly, those internet people.
JLT: We’ve got a barrage of fabulous matches tonight and our main event features our Unleashed champ Icenique teaming with her friend Mystika to take on the mis-matched team of Chimera and Katia! I'm looking forward to seeing that, it should be a surreal match to say the least!
Leah: That match is going to be interesting! We also have the Unibrow taking on Aphrodite in singles competition. The Unibrow is still being chased by Joanie Storm but she'll have to put that aside and focus on the Frenchwoman tonight! I hate the French, did I tell you that? I hate both women actually!
JLT: Dame Barbara and Shayla Walker team up to take on the returning beast Lilith and her newly-getting-divorced partner Katrina! The Occult will have a lot of agression to take out tonight and Shayla will be wanting to unleash too having suffered a loss in December, both teams will want to kickstart the new year with a victory!
Leah: We also have the debut of Courtney Monroe who teams with her sister Carley to take on Bloo and Jinx! The Monroes will not to stop pouting and start wrestling if they want to overcome BJ because BJ are a pretty experieced team albeit complete lesbian sluts!
JLT: Nice? I'm so excited for this show Leah! It's 2006! Time does fly!
Leah: Yes, let's toast to a year of normality! Things get a little surreal around here sometimes, I might have to see a shrink or something
JLT: You're not already?
Debutants Match
[Amy Rose comes to the ring and immediately tackes Crystal Hilton and begins to punch her across the face. Crystal shoves her away and begins to nail Amy with forearms and attempts a clothesline but Amy ducks and pulls Crystal into a hamerlock, Crystal uses the ropes to backflip out of it and pulls Amy into a snap suplex. Crystal then nails a leg drop to Amy and brings her to her feet. Crystal then shoves Amy into the corner, Crystal runs towards her but Amy pulls up and sits on the top turnbuckle, as Amy flips over Crystal and nails a cobra clutch suplex.]
[Amy then attempts to lock in her Sharpshooter finisher but Crystal kicks her away and springs to her feet, executing a chick kick to Amy's head. Crystal then heads to the top rope and attempts a moonsault but Amy rolls out of the way. Amy pulls Crystal into a running bulldog and then rolls Crystal over, finally locking in the Sharpshooter. Crystal then claws for the ropes but Amy pulls Crystal back into the centre of the ring.]
[Crystal eventually breaks the hold as Amy then stands and perches for Crystal to reach her feet. Amy runs towards her but Crystal side steps and executes a fisherman's suplex. Crystal then heads to top for "The Rose Whip" 450 splash and lands perfectly on Amy. Crystal then covers for the victory.]
Winner - Crystal Hilton
[“Too Cold” by Vanilla Ice hits the PA system as the fans in the arena rise to their feet, booing the entranceway as Sexy Amanda struts out with a smile on her face. She twirls and takes a sarcastic bow before walking to the ring, giving dirty looks to the fans who boo her in the front rows. She’s wearing her casual clothes of jeans and a small black shirt, she hops into the ring and approaches John Roe. She snatches the microphone from him and then with one swift motion, delivers a low blow kick, as John falls to the canvas holding his crotch.]
[Amanda laughs as John rolls around in pain, she then begins to kick him out of the ring. Amanda then points at the commentary table and then points to her mouth, zipping her lips as Leah is shown rolling her eyes. Amanda then waits impatiently for her music to cut and sighs into the microphone.]
Sexy Amanda: Last week, I saw Yuku Shiro come out her and claim that she was a legend. Later that night, Star decided to show up and claim that she was a Queen. People are talking about the legendary Kaci Russell returning, and the legendary Dame Barbara teaming up tonight. I am so sick of legends! I am sick to DEATH of hearing about how these people are so legendary!
Sexy Amanda: They haven’t achieved half of the things I have! I’m a 3 time Tag Team Champion! I deserve more respect! The only reason I’m being held back from capturing the Unleashed Championship is because the management are too scared of me. That’s right, Shane, Tequila, all the little men in the buildings, all the asslickers and all the shareholders, they’re all jealous of me!
Sexy Amanda: They’re scared that me being in the main event will expose the atrocious wrestling abilities of Chimera and Yuku Shiro, they don’t want you to see how incredibly shit Mystika is in the ring, so they’d rather have me fighting nobodies to open the show! Well I’ve had ENOUGH of it!
[Sexy Amanda regains her composure, calming herself down as takes a deep breath. She shakes her head as she glances to the backstage area.]
Sexy Amanda: That is why, I have a huge announcement tonight. I’ve decided that Shane Rockford and his cronies are obviously intimidated by my huge talent, and I want to show everybody that I am a serious threat. That’s why from now on, I will be known as Amanda Kauffman! That’s right! I’m taking on my family’s historic name, no more Sexy Amanda! It’s Amanda Kauffman from now on!
[Amanda then smiles to the audience as they give her a chorus of boos and a chant of “You suck!” begins to start. Amanda then turns to the camera in the ring with her, she points her finger down the lens as she looks directly into it.]
Amanda Kauffman: Divas Unleashed better watch out, because I’m not going to stop until I’m given what I well and truly deserve!
[Amanda tosses the microphone down onto the canvas, and storms out of the ring. She leaps off the canvas and begins to walk up the ramp, she gives a dirty look to the fans and flinches away from them trying to touch her. We cut back to ringside.]
JLT: It looks like Sexy Amanda, or should I say Amanda Kauffman, is, well, I don’t know! She seems angry at the management and she needs to learn she can’t demand this status and demand things! She needs to earn them!
Leah: I know, for God’s sake Amanda, blow Shane! That’s the easiest way to get into the main event, how do you think Krysta Taylor still has a job?!
JLT: Well, I’d prefer if Amanda actually wrestled and earned it. She has the capatabilites but attacking Barbara with chairs and all that, that’s not cool, she needs to earn respect of her peers.
Leah: …blow Shane!
Debutants Match
[The new Amanda Kauffman assaults Quinne from behind during her entrance, and ramps her head agaisnt the apron. Amanda rolls Quinne into the ring and begins to stomp on her, Amanda then tries to lock in her Bytch Tamer submission but Quinne rolls out and nips to her feet. Quinne then nails a springboard spinning heel kick to Amanda's face as Amanda stumbles backwards. Quinne tries to whip Amanda into the corner but Amanda counters it and pulls Quinne into a butterfly powerbomb, planting her on the canvas. Amanda then quickly covers but gets a two count.]
[Amanda pulls Quinne to her feet and whips her into the turnbuckle, Amanda tries to follow up but Quinne kicks her away with both feet. Quinne then nails a split-legged moonsault to Amanda for a two count. Quinne then heads to the top rope again, leaping off with her shooting star senton bomb "Downpour" finisher but Amanda rolls out of the way, Amanda then covers Quinne with a small package pin for a very close two count. Amanda then thumps the mat in frustration and complains to the referee.]
[Amanda complains to the referee as Quinne finds her feet, Amanda then turns around when she's met with a thunderous "Hey Mickey" superkick from Quinne which sends her down to the canvas as Quinne quickly covers. The referee counts 1, 2, 3. Quinne then smiles as she rolls out of the ring. Once Amanda regains herself, she attacks the referee, nailing him with a powerbomb.]
Winner - Quinne
[We cut backstage to see Felicity walking with a smug smile on her face, she’s dressed in a revealing black dress and enters the locker room marked “Shane Rockford”. She steps into the room with a smile on her face as Shane stands from his desk and greets his, Felicity pulling him into a kiss on the lips as she looks at Tequila who frowns. Felicity then turns to Shane with a smile.]
Felicity: So, where is my darling Ash? I’ve been dying to see her!
Tequila: Oh, we’re just having a little fun. We were playing a game, until we were so rudely interrupted!
Felicity: Well, where is she?
Tequila: Ugh, fine! I’ll get her!
[Tequila then opens the door of a closet and leans down, picking up the baby from the dark. Tequila then turns to Felicity, holding her in her arms. Felicity’s eyes widen as she seems her daughter dressed in a French’s maid outfit, with red lipstick smothered around her mouth and huge black shadow covering her eyes. Felicity then looks at Tequila in shock. Tequila smiles and giggles to herself.]
Tequila: We played dress-up!
Felicity: I…well…there’s…what, I don’t even know what to say! Give me my daughter you stupid bitch!
[Felicity yanks Ashley out of Tequila’s arms and immediately begins to rub the lipstick off with her hand, she then shakes her head and looks at Shane who raises his eyebrows. Felicity then speaks incredulously.]
Felicity: How could you let this happen? You just let your bimbo dress up our beloved daughter as some French prostitute?!
Shane Rockford: I’m sorry but Tequila is a nightmare when she doesn’t get what she wants. We have bigger things to talk about tonight. I’m thinking about putting you in a match with Yuku Shiro next week. How does that sound?
[Tequila gasps.]
Tequila: Ooh, let’s make it a hardcore match!
[Felicity looks at her and half-smiles, she turns back to Shane.]
Felicity: That’s fine by me! I want to get revenge for her costing me that match in the battle royal. What was that about? It seems dearest Tecky causes another problem in my life. It’s her fault, she probably attacked me out of anger for you!
Tequila: Oh, whatever. Just go and deal with your, little, lump there. What’s her name again? Aaron?
[Felicity rolls her eyes and turns to Shane. Tequila then begins to mock Felicity behind her back, pulling faces at her and waving her arms around. Shane glances at her and looks back at the mother of his child.]
Felicity: I’d love to take on Yuku Shiro next week. Thanks for thinking of me. I got your text message too, and yes, I am available for sex this weekend.
[Felicity turns to Tequila and winks as Tequila’s mouth gapes open. Felicity then leaves the room with her prostitute baby and Tequila walks up to Shane, and looks up at him. Shane then smiles at her.]
Shane Rockford: She’s joking.
Tequila: She better be!
Tag Team Match
[Blonde Ambition skip towards the ring when Keiko Nakamura leaps over the ropes with a flying splash sending them both to the canvas. Keiko rolls Carley into the ring towards RIOT who nails a stiff clotheslines. RIOT then picks Carley up and RIOT locks in a bear hug leans them back as Keiko takes Carley's head off with a diving kneedrop. Keiko then attempts a powerbomb move but Carley counters with a hurricanrana. Carley then runs to her corner and tags in Courtney.]
[Keiko charges towards Courtney but Courtney nails a dropkick. Courtney then leaps into the air and begins to dance around but Keiko grabs Courtney and nails a back drop. Keiko then tags in RIOT and Keiko begins to swing Courtney around with a giant swing and RIOT runs to the ropes, nailing a running knee to the face. Keiko and RIOT then begin to stomp on Courtney before they pick her up and pull her into a NW3D (Nakamura-Watanabe Dead Diva Drop) as RIOT with a standing fireman's carry swung out into a flapjack, Keiko hits a Stunner on Courtney and covers for a pin.]
[Carley tries to run into the ring but suddenly she looks down to see Katrina holding on to her legs. The referee counts to three as RIOT and Keiko then celebrate with a hug and leave the ring with a focused look on their face. Carley then leaps from the apron as the Occult have arrived at ringside, Carley tries to body splash Lilith but Lilith drives her back into the ring post. Katrina then shouts at Carley as the duo head up the ramp.]
Winners - Keiko Nakamura & RIOT
[We cut backstage to see an angry Courtney Monroe pulling her sister along as Carley sulks, Courtney holds her neck as the two burst into Shane Rockford’s office, Tequila leaps up from Shane’s lap and stands next to him as she sits in his chair.]
Courtney Monroe: Hey! You! Did you see what those big meanies the Occult did to us?!
Shane Rockford: Actually, I was a little pre-occupied.
[Tequila smiles as Courtney looks at Carley who shrugs dramatically.]
Courtney Monroe: Well! They were super duper mean! Katrina and Lilith attacked us! They are bullies! That big freaky thing Lilith is really scarrryy!
Shane Rockford: Well, how about next week you two can take on Katrina and a mystery partner in a handicap match?
Courtney Monroe: YAY! That sounds fabultaiotastic!
[Shane raises his eyebrows and smiles.]
Shane Rockford: Riight. Is that all?
[Courtney then turns and yanks Carley with her but accidently walks into the wall. Courtney then turns and frowns at Shane and pulls open the door, accidently hitting Carley in the face as Blonde Ambition stumble out of the room.]
Standard Match
[Aphrodite comes to the ring checking her nose as the Unibrow nails a baseball slide to her. Aphrodite then gets up in shock and slides into the ring, spearing the Stripped Champion. Aphrodite then shoves the Unibrow into the corner and climbs up to the top rope and executes a frankensteiner. Aphrodite then covers for a two count but the Unibrow kicks out.]
[Aphrodite then complains to the referee and begins to adjust her hair, the Unibrow comes from behind with a school boy but Aphrodite rolls through and nails an Aphrodite chick kick to the face of the Unibrow, she covers for a two count but the Unibrow gets her foot on the ropes.]
[Aphrodite then turns as Dr. Doomsday has scaled the top rope, Doomsday then leaps into the air with a body splash plancha but Aphrodite simply steps out of the way as Doomsday slams into the canvas. Aphrodite then laughs to herself when the Unibrow comes from behind with a school boy, as the referee counts to 3.]
The winner - The Unibrow
[We cut backstage to see Vixen walking along to the corridor to her dressing room, she’s dressed in her ring attire and begins to slow down as she approaches the room, hearing muffled sounds coming from it. She stops outside the door marked “Dame Barbara” when suddenly the sounds stop and Amanda Kauffman walks out of the room, she has a sweaty brow and smiles at Vixen, surprised.]
Amanda Kauffman: Oh hey, are the girl whose teaming with Barbara tonight?
Vixen: Yeah, my name is Vixen.
Amanda Kauffman: Oh hi, well, it seems we have a tiny problem. You see, I just, how do I put this? I just beat the crap out of the old hag and I don’t think she’s going to compete tonight. It looks like you’ll be competing in a handicap match, your legendary partner isn’t so legendary anymore.
Vixen: Wh-
Amanda Kauffman: I’m not finished. You need to treat me with some respect, next time you see me, you should bow down in worship. Do you know who I am? Do you know what I am?
Vixen: An egotistical bitch?
[Amanda gasps at Vixen’s comment and slaps her across the face, Vixen stumbles backwards and hits Amanda, knocking her to the floor. Vixen then rushes into Barbara’s locker room and kneels down at her side, as Barbara lies on the floor unconcoius and bleeding from the head. Vixen then calls for medics as Amanda rises and smiles through the doorway.]
JLT: Amanda just, well, we don’t know! It looks like Amanda just assaulted Dame Barbara in her dressing room and it looks like Barbara won’t be able to compete tonight!
Leah: That’s great news!
JLT: No it’s not!
Leah: It is, I’m so glad that we don’t have a dinosaur parading around the ring, smelling of urine and trying to remember what the hell she’s doing out here! It’s about time!
Handicap Match
[Vixen comes to the ring alone and Katia immediately attacks her from behind, Katia nails a bulldog on Vixen and begins to stomp on her. Katia pulls Vixen up into the air and nails a brainbuster suplex and tags in Felicity. Katia and Felicity then join arms and attempt a double clothesline but Vixen ducks and nails a double DDT to both divas.]
[Vixen then sends Felicity into the corner but Felicity counters into a short clothesline but Vixen ducks and nails a neckbreaker. Vixen then heads to the top rope and leaps off with a hurricanrana but Felicity counters the move into a styles clash move and plants Vixen in the canvas, rolling her over for a two count. Felicity then tags in Katia.]
[Katia climbs to the top rope, attempting to nail her blockbuster "The Chaotic Kittie" finisher but Vixen ducks and Katia hits the canvas. Katia finds her feet and runs towards Vixen who plants Katia with a mickinoku driver in the centre of the ring. Vixen then hops up and knocks Felicity off the apron, climbing to the top rope and nailing a shooting star press for the three count and victory.]
Winner - Vixen
[After the match, Katia assaults Vixen from behind with a chair and Ruby and Katia begin to beat down Vixen. Katia then gets on the microphone and claims she will be the next Unleashed Champion as she is the greatest wrestler on Earth.]
[“Son of a Gun” by Janet Jackson hits the PA system as the fans give a mixed reaction to the music. Tequila struts out onto the stage, wearing revealing red dress and a wide smile. Shane Rockford follows her, he smiles at his girlfriend and the two make there way to the ring. Tequila hanging onto the apron and sneering at the girls who cheer for the sexy president.]
[Shane climbs into the ring and helps his wife in too by sitting on the ropes, Tequila then blows kisses to the fans as Shane Rockford takes a microphone from a stagehand and nods to the audience as his music dies down.]
Shane Rockford: Last week was filled with surprises. We had the return of Yuku Shiro, Felicity and Kaci Russell, the debut of Crystal Hilton, a surprise appearance by Star and an excellent battle royal to crown a brand new champion. It was a pretty special show, and seeing as Icenique is no longer the champion, our punishment for her worked.
Shane Rockford: However, it wouldn’t be fair to deny Icenique a shot at the Unleashed championship just because of that one incident at Nuclear Pussy III. Especially since she was effectively robbed by the pain in the ass that is Suzie Woods. That’s why, I’ve watched the battle royal again and I’ve decided to make an Unleashed contendership match, pitting the people who impressed me most in the match against each other in a fatal four way next week in Greece.
Shane Rockford: First, will be Vixen. You can’t deny that on her debut, she impressed everyone and survived to the very end, especially since she entered first. The second woman will be Icenique, now, I have to watch what I say here but I think she was robbed. I know you can say it’s karma, she robbed the fans and so she was robbed too, but she did not deserve to lose her championship that’s why, that’s why I’m giving her a second chance to get into the number one position next week.
Shane Rockford: The third entries will be Mystika, and the fourth will be Katia. I’m not going into reasons for them because I feel they’re self-explainitory. So next week in Athens we’ll see Icenique, Katia, Mystika and Vixen fighting it out in a fatal four way for the contedership of the Unleashed Championship!
[The fans cheer as Tequila then suddenly takes a bow, Shane scowls at her and smiles into the microphone, holding up a finger.]
Shane Rockford: Now, numerous people have brought to my attention that DU has a tough policy about people holding two championships at once. You see, I’m a believer in fairness and I don’t think it’s very good for the health of Divas Unleashed for Chimera to hold both the Unleashed and Rockford State Championship. That’s why next week, I’m making a gauntlet featuring an array of DU superstars who will battle it out for the Rockford State Championship!
Shane Rockford: The line-up will be revealed shortly, I’m going to personally hand pick the entries into that battle royal of who I think deserves it most, and who has the nicest ass.
[Shane laughs to himself as Tequila shakes her hand and Tequila slaps Shane on the arm as he rolls his eyes.]
Shane Rockford: That’s all for tonight, enjoy the rest of your evening!
[Tequila then hugs onto Shane’s arm as he escorts her out of the ring. Shane then heads up the ramp as his girlfriend’s theme plays for him, we cut to the commentary table as Leah dances in her seat to the theme.]
JLT: WOW! What an exciting show it looks to be next week! We’ll see two huge matches, the contendership of the Unleashed Championship decided in a fatal four way and a gauntlet for the Rockford State Championship!
Leah: The only thing that would make that show better is if Mariah Carey declared she was going to undergo liposuction and ass implants live in that very ring! But it’s not! I’m sad!
JLT: You’re sad alright.
Standard Match
[Chimera and Yuku tie up with Yuku shoving Chimera down to the canvas. Chimera finds her feet and kicks Yuku, sending her into the corner. Chimera follows up with an attempted shoulder block but Yuku moves out of the way and nails a reverse x factor from behind. Yuku then heads to the top rope but Chimera comes from behind and executes an electric chair to Lady Fist. Chimera then covers but gets a two count.]
[Chimera then brings Yuku to her feet and attempts a pedigree but Yuku reverses it and pulls Chimera into a dragon sleeper, Yuku then springboards off the ropes and nails a springboard stunner and comes for a two count. Yuku then brings Chimera to her feet and attempts a "Life Hammer" but Chimera counters it and runs to the ropes and lands on her feet, Chimera then nails a running neckbreaker from behind.]
[Chimera then waits for Yuku to find her feet before kicking her and pulling her into a modified widow's peak "Angelic Angst" but Yuku Shiro kicks her legs and escapes the hold. Yuku then kicks Chimera and brings her into a "Life Hammer", hoisting her into the air but Felicity is suddenly at ringside and yanks on Yuku's feet as Yuku stumbles backwards and Chimera lands on top of her with a splash. Chimera then uses to the ropes as she covers for three count.]
Winner - Chimera
[Felicity then walks up the apron with a smile on her face as Chimera rolls out of the ring and hugs her Unleashed Championship. Chimera then offers a smile to Yuku Shiro who stands in the ring with a pissed expression on her face as she shakes her head. Exile fades off air as Felicity walks up the ramp with a smile on her face.]
Brought to you by Rockstar Entertainments
Epilogue
There was a lot of Shane on tonight's show but it wasn't really intentional, it just turned out that way, next weeks show will be a lot better, this was just really a build-up but I hope everyone enjoyeed the show, we had a good week of consistant rping and I hop we can keep it up! Thank you for reading!
-Card Subject to Change-
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