March 2nd 2007
EnergySolutions Arena, Salt Lake City, Utah

[We cut into the arena and the fans are on their feet, cheering, thrusting their signs into the air. The theme to Exile blasts over the arena, as the camera pans away from the stage, over the ring, over the commentators and into the cheering crowd. The camera then pans around the arena to see the signs held by the fans, with the signs in an arrange of colours and messages. The director of the show picks out his favourite: “Boise Loves J-Collins!”, “I'm Beggin' 4 Meggie!” and “Janine! Jump To TNA!” are just a select few. The audience cheers as we pan around the audience once more before we cut to JLT and Leah at ringside. They smile at the camera.] JLT: Welcome to Exile live from Boise, Idaho! We have the fall-out from Nuclear Pussy 4, feelings are running high and this should be an exposive evening! I'm JLT and I'm joined, as always, by the acquired taste that is Leah! Leah: Acquired taste?! I'm getting compared to coffee and TEA? JLT: Well peo-! Leah: No, Jamie! I'm not doing any introductions AGAIN! I won't sit here and be insulted by you! JLT: I didn't ins- Leah: I said NO! I am worth more than a coffee! Wait, that means I'm like Starbucks! Does that mean I'm a slut because there's a Starbucks on every corner? This gets worse! JLT: I give up! Leah: Good! God, you're mean to me! JLT: I was not! Leah: Let's just do the show, I'm apalled at you! JLT: Fine! Debutants Match Morrigan vs. Undine COMING SOON *Backstage in the lounge room, Linda is sitting on top of a Laz-E-Boy chair, working on tying the pink ribbon around her eyes. On the couch across from her is her best friend, Tanya Flaire.* Tanya: Isn't it a little hard to walk around with that thing on? *Linda, pulling the blind off her left eye, looks over at Tanya.* Linda: Not too much, no. I've got some good hearing, and if I'm afraid I bump into someone, I can just pull it off until I get to the stage. *She sticks her tongue out at Tanya, who just laughs at her. Linda pulls the ribbon back up to her eye, and stands up to stretch.* Tanya: So where do you want to go after your match? Linda: We're going out tonight? Tanya: I told you that. We need to find you a guy sooner or later. Linda: *Now reaching for her toes* You failed to mention it was tonight, though. Tanya: What's wrong with that? Linda: Well, you've seen me before. THis is all I wear. *She stops stretching and points down to her blue jeans and pink top.* Linda: Tanya, I never wore a dress in my LIFE! Tanya: Alright, fine. *She slaps her hands on her thighs, sits up, and walks over to Linda, putting her hand on her shoulder.* Tanya: After you win against Noriko tonight, tomorrow we're going to go and find you something to wear. Linda: You say that like I might lose. *Tanya rubs her chin for a second, and smiles.* Tanya: Well, if you lose...you're buying drinks afterwards. Linda: Oh, come on! *The two girls share a laugh, and then a knock on the door can be heard.* Linda: Yeah? Stagehand: *From outside the room* Ms. Ragnal, your match is up soon. Linda: Alright, thanks. *Linda pats Tanya on her shoulder, and heads for the door.* Linda: I'll see you afterwards. Wish me luck. Tanya: Nah, if I did, I'd end up buying the drinks. *Tanya just laughs as Linda walks out the door, giggling as she heads towards the ring.* Standard Match Linda Ragnal vs. Noriko Lee JLT: We’ve got Noriko Lee, the Askai Champion, taking on the blonde and bright-eyed Linda Ragnal in singles action next, this should be an interesting match! Linda won a debutants match last week, defeating three other women and a victory over the Askai Champion could propel her even further! Leah: That’s true, the only time Asians will stop you is when they ram you into with their cars. They’re such bad drivers. JLT: Leah! Leah: Yeah, so I hope Linda wins. Noriko is okay but she should totally unleashed her cane on Linda and end this quick! I like it when she brings out the weapons! [Linda and Noriko circle each other, Noriko eyes her cane lying under the turnbuckle. Linda then leaps forward, nailing Noriko with a boot to the stomach and nails her with shots to the face. Noriko manages to counter and pokes Linda in the eye, Linda holds her face as Noriko leaps into the air and connects with a spinning heel kick to knock her down into the canvas.] JLT: Noriko’s got a good martial arts background that should come in handy with this match! [Noriko bounces to the ropes but Linda leaps to her feet and nails an arm drag sending Noriko flying across the ring, Noriko sits up, angry. Noriko then runs towards Linda but Linda runs towards her and leaps into the air, catching Noriko with a running neckbreaker and plants her in the mat.] Leah: That was a nice move, she charged at Noriko and showed no fear! She’s like a rhino, especially with that hair! JLT: What is wrong with her hair? Leah: Nothing… JLT: Linda has a cover! [Linda rolls Noriko over for a cover.] [1] [2] [Noriko gets her shoulder up.] Leah: Noriko’s a champion, how embarrassing would it be if she lost to Linda? JLT: Linda’s a great competitor! [Both women find their feet, Linda runs towards Noriko but Noriko counters with a hurricanrana, Noriko holds her position on Linda’s neck and nails her in the forehead with closed fists. The referee warns her as Noriko brings Linda to her feet, Noriko whips Linda into the corner but Linda reverses, sending Noriko flying and crashing into the corner.] [Linda then runs towards Noriko but Noriko nails her in the face with a kick, Noriko looks angry as she scoops up her Singapore cane from under the ring. She hops onto the top rope, the referee warns her and tries to snatch the cane but Noriko shoves him away.] JLT: What is Noriko doing?! Leah: Something dabulous! [Linda turns to face Noriko as Noriko leaps into the air, smashing the cane over Linda’s head as Linda falls backwards into the canvas. The referee calls for the bell as Noriko stands with a smile on her face, the audience boos. Linda lies motionless as Noriko wipes her mouth and rolls out of the ring.] JLT: What a cheater! I’m disgusted! John Roe: Here is your winner via disqualification…LINDA RAGNAL!!! Leah: Hey, Linda still won! [Noriko snatches her championship belt from a stagehand and walks up the ramp, satisfied with a tainted victory. Linda lies on the canvas as the referee checks on her, Linda holds her forehead from the shot and looks dazed, the victim of an unprovoked attack.] Leah: I was right, Noriko ended it with the cane! JLT: She’s such a cheater! That wasn’t fair, Linda was taking the fight right to her and Noriko had to cheat! She may not have won the match but she looks like she’s happy with what she did! Leah: Poor Linda, that’s what you get when you have hair that colour. {Backstage cameras show the beautiful young Texan woman, Inferna, standing at a drinking fountain. The unwilling slave to Amber Burton bends over to quench her thirst. She hears an annoyed foot-stamping, and sighs before looking up. Amber stands adjacent to her young, contractual pet. She purses her lips, staring with a commanding gleam into Inferna's rebellious eyes.} Amber: "What do you think you're doing?" Inferna: Well, I was thirsty. So, I figured I could get a drink. You know, so I wouldn't dehydrate before the match?" {The dominating Amber is quiet quick with the riding crop, and lashes it across Inferna's butt with a hearty crack. The look on her face is one of pure anger and dread. Inferna looks at her master in bewilderment while gently massaging her rear with a palm.} Inferna: "I'm sorry, Mistress." Amber: "Don't you ever leave my side at an event, without an explanation, ever again! Do you not realize our rivals could jump you in this hallway if you're left all alone?" {Inferna turns her head away from Amber, staring down the hallway; obviously trying to maintain her cool.} Amber: "All week long we have worked on being a team, and I am this team's leader. You will do what I say, when I say, or you will seek a new employer!" Inferna: "Could you please just let me focus on wrestling tonight, Amber?" {Amber cracks her riding crop in her hands, giving Inferna a quick warning.} Inferna: "My Mistress." Amber: "Indeed. Back to the lockerroom, then." {Stephanie Sullivan walks onto the scene, and seems immediately disgusted with what is transpiring . She quickly gets in Amber's face.} Stephanie: "What the Hell do you think you are doing to her!?" Amber: (with a coy smirk) “Chastisting her. What business is that of yours?" {Stephanie seems upset at Amber's treatment of Inferna, and stares directly at Amber as she replies.} Stephanie: "I don't agree with your methods, no human being needs to be treated like that." Amber: "She's my property. Mine to do with as I please, and I don't need the "Queen of Wrestling" impugning my authority." {Amber smiles coyly.} "Run along, lest you find a place over my knee and receive your own punishment." {Stephanie seems a bit upset as she doesn't appreciate the disrespect from Amber Burton. Stephanie's pride kicks in as she offers a proposition to Amber.} Stephanie: "How about you and I meet in the ring next week. What do you say to that? Or, are you afraid of the Queen of Wrestling?" {Amber laughs the laughs of a woman completely in control, and studies the Queen icily.} Amber: "You get the same deal as she got. If you win, I will grant Inferna her freedom. She may do whatever she likes. If you lose however...."Amber pushes Stephanies chin high with her riding crop. "YOU'RE MINE AS WELL!" Stephanie: (laughing a little) "You're on." {Amber smiles until she looks to Inferna and notices that her property is smiling as well. With a growl she roughly hooks the chain onto Inferna's collar, and grins evilly as Stephanie as they pass.} Amber: "You can afford to pack lightly." {With a growl she roughly hooks the chain onto her collar, and grins evilly at Stephanie as they pass.} Tag Team Match Amber Burton & Inferna vs. Janine Johnson & Maya Okosaki JLT: Up next it’s Amber Burton and Inferna taking on the friends Janine Johnson and Maya Okosaki, this should be an interesting match to watch because of both team’s chemistry! Janine and Maya are friends and have had each other’s backs in recent weeks but Amber Burton is the ‘master’, or ‘mistress’, of Inferna! Leah: Yeah, Inferna is her property! JLT: I can’t wait to see how they gel together as a team, do you think Amber will get Inferna to do all of her dirty week? Leah: No I’ve heard they’ve been “training together” to prepare for this match but you know what that means…lesbian sex. And I don’t want the lesbians back in DU! {The arena goes black, and laser lights play over the crowd as Pantera‘s ‘Domination’ blasts over the P.A. Amber walks onto the stage wearing a black and silver singlet, a fishnet bodysuit, and a pair of matching boots. In her right hand is a black riding crop and in her left a long gold chain. She smiles at the crowd, and tugs the chain, making Inferna stumble forward into view.} John Roe: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, at a combined weight of 259lbs...AMBER BURTON & INFERNA!!! {Amber struts to the ring, and Inferna follows along obediently. From the look on her face it’s clear she is not enjoying the walk to the ring. Both climb the stairs, and Amber goes in between the top and second strand. Inferna hops over the top rope, and is first in the ring. She looks at her mistress with a smile, and climbs the turnbuckle playing to the fans.} {Amber drops the chain, and swats Inferna on the ass with the riding crop. Hard enough to get her attention, but not hard enough to leave a mark. Inferna steps down holing her backside, and the crowd boos in reaction to the strike.} ["Papercut (Reanimantion Remix)" by Linkin Park hits as the lights dim. Randomly colored strobe lights move through the crowd as smoke engulfs the stage. Janine Johnson emerges through the smoke and immediately recieves cheers. Maya Okosaki stands at her side, she stands seriously on the stage as Janine poses. Janine runs down the aisle and slides into the ring as Maya follows suit.] John Roe: Their opponents, at a combined weight of 250lbs...JANINE JOHNSON & MAYA OKOSAKI!!! [Maya heads to her corner to meditate as Janine climbs the turnbuckles and raises her arms before doing a backflip off the top and landing on her feet. The lights return to normal as Janine prepares for her match and Maya steps out of her meditation.] [The referee calls for the bell as Amber leaves the ring and points Inferna to Maya, Maya and Inferna circle each other. They tie-up as Maya brings Inferna into a headlock and flips her down onto the canvas, using her legs to try and pull Inferna’s arm into an armbar but Inferna rolls away and to her feet.] [Inferna runs to the ropes as Maya nips up, Maya scoops Inferna up into a sidewalk slam position but Inferna counters with a headscissors takedown, sending Maya flying across the ring. Maya rolls to her feet, she charges towards Inferna. Inferna tries to clothesline her but Maya swings around Inferna’s arm and executes a crucifix pin, rolling Inferna backwards.] Leah: Here we go! [1] [2] [Inferna rolls out of the pin.] JLT: Those type of pins can be a danger trap sometimes! Inferna managed to escape! [Infera climbs to her feet as both women approach each other. Maya Okosaki takes the upperhand against Inferna with rapid kicks into her midsection. She backs the Texan rookie into one of the neutral corners, and continues her assault with mid-kicks and backhand chops.] JLT: Amber is looking on from the corner. Leah: Maya is tearing into Inferna. [Infera ducks under a chop, sending Maya into the corner. Inferna fires in with alternating elbow shots to Maya's face, then leaps up for a beautiful standing hurricanranna.] JLT: Nice move from Inferna, she has a cover! [1] [2] Leah: Maya able to kick-out, it's too early for that veteran to be pinned. [Infera bounces off the ropes, and floors Maya with a corkscrew crossbody. Inferna stands up, kicks Maya in the ribcage, then delivers a standing star press.] JLT: Inferna is definitely showing off her athleticism tonight. Leah: Standing star press landing in the cover. [1] [2] JLT: She got her shoulder up. [Inferna measures the rising Maya, and levels her with a nice enzuigiri kick. She spins around to her feet, and Amber has her hand over the ropes for a tag.] JLT: I wonder what it feels like to be tag team partner of someone who literally owns you. Leah: Probably about as comforting as a kick in the head. [Inferna says "no" and turns back to Maya, who nails Inferna with a spinning wheel kick. Maya then heads to her corner and tags in Janine, Janine hops over the ropes. She approaches Inferna and nails her with a kick to the stomach, she pulls Inferna into a powerbomb position and hoists her into the air but Inferna manages to land behind Janine, Inferna then grabs Janine and drives her into the canvas with a neckbreaker.] JLT: A good counter from Inferna, she needs to make a tag! [Inferna heads to her corner and tags in Amber, Amber shoots her a look and climbs into the ring. She approaches Janine but Janine suddenly lunges at her and nails her in the face with a barrage of left and rights, Janine then whips Amber into the corner and follows up with a running clothesline.] [Janine then nails a kick to Amber’s ribs, with the shot echoing around the arena. Janine scoops Amber up into her arms and props her sideways on the top turnbuckle, Janine then steps up onto the second rope, picking up Amber’s body into a fallaway slam. Janine climbs to the top rope as the fans rise to their feet.] [Janine then moonsaults backwards, executing a fallaway slam and planting Amber into the canvas. Janine then covers, hooking the leg.] Leah: What a move from Janine! Who knew that Asian had that in her? JLT: Here’s a cover! [1] [2] [Amber gets her shoulder up.] [Janine then rolls to her feet and heads to the turnbuckle, she climbs onto the top rope as Amber lies on the canvas. Janine leaps forward with a swanton bomb “Swandive” but Amber rolls out of the way and Janine smacks into the canvas. Janine climbs to her feet, holding her lower back as Amber approaches her from behind and slaps her on the ass.] Leah: Spanking?! JLT: That’s an insult, Janine doesn’t look to happy! [Janine turns around, angry as Amber takes Janine down with a vicious snap STO, and tags Inferna in.] Leah: The Texan slave going from the apron to the turnbuckle. JLT: She's measuring for something. [Inferna leaps off the turnbuckle with a forward-moving backflip whilst simultanesouly executing a 360degree horizontal corkscrew. As she comes down, she twists a little further and lands on a ringshaking elbow drop on Janine Johnson.] JLT: Punker Drop from Inferna! Leah: Look at the smile that brought to the face of Amber Burton, who contractually owns Inferna as property. JLT: Why do you keep bringing that up? Leah: Because it's true and humiliating. JLT: The cover from Inferna. [1] [2] [Janine manages to get her foot on the rope, and the referee halts the count.] [Janine starts to rise, but Inferna spins around and sweeps out her ankle. As Janine falls back to the ground, Inferna vertically leaps right onto the top turnbuckle pad while Amber looks on, pleased. Inferna backflips off the top with a moonsault, but rotates into a double stomp across Janine's chest!] JLT: And that was the eXcaper! Leah: Devastating move by the slave. [Inferna drags Janine into the center of the ring. She grabs the back of her own head, before leaping as high as she can off the mat and performing a standing 450-roatation Splash.] JLT: Inferna with the Revolution, straight into the pin. [1] [2] [Maya breaks up the cover with a kick, and returns to her corner with Infera yelling at her.] JLT: Maya saved her team, Inferna’s not too happy about that though! [Amber Burton then drops from the apron and runs around the ring, she heads over to Maya and yanks her down off the apron and nails her with a fist across the face, Maya stumbles backwards as Amber grabs her head and rams it into the apron. Amber then tries to do the same move again but Maya elbows Amber and grabs her arm, taking her down onto the padded floor with a crippler crossface-style submission.] Leah: That looks so painful, I love it! [Amber calls out for her slave as she writhes in pain, Inferna rushes to the ropes and looks over. Inferna tries to climb out of the ring but Janine Johnson comes from behind, she drags her back in and rolls her up into a schoolboy pin, applying all her weight onto Inferna’s body as the referee counts.] JLT: Janine will a roll-up! [1] [2] [3] JLT: It’s over! John Roe: Here are your winners…JANINE JOHNSON & MAYA OKOSAKI!!! [Janine then rolls of the ring and smiles, raising her arms into the air at the upset pin. Maya releases Amber and stands to her feet, she brushes herself down and calmly begins to walk backstage. Janine runs over to her and the two friends hug, Janine raises Maya’s hand in the air. Maya then smiles politely at Janine and walks backstage as Janine celebrates with the fans.] [Amber climbs to her feet and rolls into the ring, she holds her arm and neck. She approaches Inferna who stands, shocked at the pin. Amber then grabs the chain around Inferna’s neck and yanks it down, causing Inferna to fall to her knees. Amber then exits the ring, yanking Inferna as she trails behind, pulling her like a dog backstage as Amber has an angry impression on her face.] JLT: Janine and Maya pick up a victory tonight but I’m not sure that bodes well for Inferna, do you think Amber will punish her? Leah: How am I supposed to know what those lesbians get up to? I’ve heard the word dominatrix used so I shudder to think, it’s Amber’s fault for the loss anyway! JLT: I don’t know who’s fault it is but that was a solid match, I think Amber and Inferna should be proud of their effort, they just caught out! [Scene takes the place in the office of Shane Rockford, he is standing on his cell phone talking when a knock is heard on his door. He turns to yell the word come in as he turns back to get back into his little call. Kibby walks in, wearing a tiny baby blue velvet robe she draws the attention of Shane eyes to her lovely figure. She does a slow but ever so sexy twirl, as she stops only to tug on the belt of the robe. Shane quickly hangs up the phone as he tosses it and Kibby gives off a giggle.] Kibby: Well Hello…you. Shane: Um…Hi. May I help you with something? Kibby: Well yeah, actually I came here to talk about my title. Shane: Your title? Kibby: That’s right; see I was hoping you would make my match tonight against Moria a number one contender match. [Shane nods but is still shaky about her demand.] Shane: Well, I don’t know. [Kibby smirks as she pulls more on the belt, trying to untangle her robe.] Kibby: What if I… [Kibby pulls the robe open showing only Shane her main assets that problem got her the job here. The cameras really don’t get to see what Shane see the only get the back of Kib’s and the face of Shane.] Shane: I don’t know what to say? Kibby: All you have to say is yes. Shane: Well Tonight you got it, but next week you will duke it out with someone I think deserves the title also MEGGIE! [Kibby’s mouth drops as she folds her arms.] Shane: Then at the next PPV, you will go against Meggie and Aphrodite for the Stripped Championship. Let’s just say it will be a NP4 Rematch. Kibby: So next week I will face some Blonde Reject…Fine I will show you just why I’m the only blonde that matters...Oh and Shane I want to pick the stipulation next week when I face Meggie. Shane: Name you poison? Kibby: Ooooh…that gives me an idea, I want to face here in a Anywhere falls…No hold bares Catfight! Shane: You got it next week…I think you need to get ready for you match tonight? Kibby: Yeah, Oh and Shane…forget me not. Because I will be back. [Kibby winks her eye as she walks out of the room, maybe leaving Shane brain full of nasty thoughts.] Standard Match Jenny Astor vs. Stephanie Sullivan JLT: We’ve got Jenny Astor and Stephanie Sullivan going head-to-head up next, this should be an interesting match. Jenny is the best friend of Cherrie Hilton and Stephanie is the best friend of Crystal Hilton, and you know both Hiltons don’t get along! Leah: Yeah, I love it when people use their friends to sort out their own personal problems, it’s so bitchy! JLT: This should be an interesting match to watch, I have no idea who the winner will be! Leah: Please, it’s Jenny for sure. ["Work It" by Missy Elliot hits the speakers, as a flurry of white and yellow pyro's explode under the Jumbotron. Jenny Astor steps out onto the staging area, looking over the jam packed arena as the ring announcer calls her name over the microphone.] John Roe: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Pontiac, Michigan; at a weight of 134lbs...JENNY ASTOR!!! [Goodies by Ciara starts to play across the Pa system and Stephanie slowly emerges from behind the curtain, she slowly walks down the ramp way clad in her black shorts, boots, and black tank top. Before entering the ring she stops and just looks around at the audience around her as they all begin to boo her. She raises her hands in the air and yells out the Queen has arrived before entering inside the ring. She seductively rolls under the ring and raises her hands in the air to a crowd of booing.] John Roe: Her opponent, from Los Angeles, California; at a weight of 230lbs...STEPHANIE SULLIVAN!!! [The crowd gives a warm ovation for the popular ebony beauty. She slowly starts down the entrance ramp, pausing to high five a few lucky fans in the front row, before sliding under the bottom rope and making her entrance into the ring for the start of her match.] {The match is still in full swing, but the crowd boos loudly as Amber angrily leads Inferna to ringside. Roughly pulling her behind with her chain. Inferna is shaking her head, and struggling, apparently wanting no part in whatever Amber is planning. The young Texan finally manages to stop Amber short of the ring, by falling on her butt, and pulling with all her strength. Undaunted Amber simply goes to the railing, wraps the chain, and uses a master lock to hold her in place. Angrily she stomps up the ramp to Inferna, and shouts at her while the match is still in progress.} Amber: “How dare you smile at her!” Amber swats Inferna’s thigh smartly with her crop. “After all I’ve done for you, she is your hero?! I’ll show you how your mistress deals with heroes!” {Inferna pleads, and tries to grab Amber’s leg, but misses. She is forced to watch as Amber stomps around the ring, looking evilly at Stephanie.} {As the bells sounds, Jenny and Stephanie circle each other. All of a sudden, Amber Burton rushes the ring, she knocks Stephanie down with a blindside from behind and kicks Stephanie in the head. The winded woman stumbles back from the hit, and looks a bit bleary eyed. Jenny Astor is quick to exit the ring, and walks up the ramp confused as she watches the carnage in the ring. Amber pushes Steph to the ropes, and whips her to the far side. Amber bounds from the near, handsprings, and goes for the hair tease, but Steph ducks!} Leah: “You don’t push a dominatrix!” JLT: “Apparently you don’t push a queen either. Amber landed hard!” {Stephanie pulls amber to her feet by the hair, and begins rattling her with rights and lefts. The dominatrix is stunned, and Stephanie locks her into a brutal DDT. The camera pans to Inferna who is still on the ramp, and watching the scene with awe. Stephanie picks up Amber’s discarded riding crop, and signals to the crowd that she is going to spank Amber.} JLT: “Well this worm is about the turn on Amber!” {Stephanie draws back and calls to the crowd. In the one second she looks away, Amber’s left foot drives into her midsection and folds Stephanie in half. Amber nips to her feet, then whips Stephanie through the ropes, and into the ringpost! The crowd boos loudly, as Amber shakes her head. She reaches into her tights and pulls out a set of handcuffs. Roughly she cuffs the Queen’s hands around the post.} Leah: “Amber is not happy now!” {Amber moves behind Stephanie, and roughly pulls down her tights, revealing her undie clad bottom. She then moves to the center of the ring, and picks up her crop. Inferna is shaking her head wildly, and begging amber to cease. Amber points the crop at her, then moves in on Stephanie, flailing shot after shot onto her exposed buttocks!} JLT: “Someone has to stop this!” Leah: “Wasn’t the hero about to the same thing?” {Stephanie has come too, and is trying to free herself, but is just getting her fanny turned red. Security rushes the ring, and forces Amber out. They work to free her, while Amber unlocks Inferna, and drags her to the back.} (The lights in the arena fade as the big screen lights up with a large pink preview logo.) JLT: I wonder what this is… Leah: Ooh, I hope it's Erykah Badu coming to give me my paychecks! JLT: Probably not. (A Bombastic announcers voice echoes over the P/A system.) Bombastic Announcer: In the tradition of Newlyweds, The Simple Life, Laguna Beach and The Hills comes the next epic event in reality TV show history! (Shows Courtney and Carley pulling each others hair.) Courtney: Carley, let go! Carley: Nuh-uh! Bombastic Announcer: Staring those ever lovable Monroe sisters… Carley and Courtney! (The vignette shows Carley smiling and waving madly at the camera.) Carley: Hiya! (Courtney makes a pig face at the camera.) Courtney: I'm Courtney and this is Mr. Bunny! (Holds up Mr. Bunny proudly to the camera.) Bombastic Announcer: The ever fun and ever cute… Tiger Lily! (The scene shows Tiger Lily lying on a beach chair with a glass of pink lemonade in hand.) Lily: Paris Hilton ain’t got nothing on us. (Lily smiles and raises her glass at the camera before taking a sip of the lemonade.) Bombastic Announcer: The girl with the Californian tan… Meggie! (The scene shows Meggie, rubbing on tanning lotion before she leaps and begins to run in the sand towards the camera.) Meggie: "Don't be jealous of the tan, it's an all natural glow." Bombastic Announcer: And last but certainly not least the President of the Blonde Ambition fan club… Mistress! (Mistress is showing recording something with her camera then turns to look at the camera while still recording and waves while giggling.) Bombastic Announcer: Coming to Rockstar Entertainment BLONDE TV! (A blonde wig drops on the ‘T’ of the Blonde TV logo) (The image fades and we cut back to the announce table where Leah is just staring blankly at the big screen not believing what she’s just witnessed.) JLT: Well that looks like it's going to be fun! Leah: … JLT: Did you not like it, Leah? Leah: … JLT: I thought it looked great, I love Blonde Ambition, they're so fun! (Leah suddenly starts bawling and banging her head on the table.) Leah: No, no, no! JLT: You really hate Blonde Ambition, don't you? Leah: Yes and this means the apocalypse is coming! We're all gonna DIE! Standard Match KibbyD vs. Moira Storm JLT: : “Up next we have Kibby vs. Moria Storm…” Leah: “Oh shit.” JLT: “What?” Leah: “Well Kibby is likely to break into song, and since her opponent is from austrailia I’m hoping it isn’t ‘Tie me kangaroo down’. I swear if she does that, I will hurl.” (The lights in the arena turn to yellow and orange and bright strobe-lights flash and with the sound of electric discharges 'The Storm Is Here' hits the speakers. Moira Storm walks out onto the stage at the top of the entrance ramp, greeting the fans with a wave of her hand and blowing them a couple of kisses before heading down the ramp, high fiving outstretched hands as she jogs towards the ring, then slides in, raising herself to her knees and glancing about the cheering crowd before jumping up to her feet. She heads to the far turnbuckles, climbs them and thumps her fist against her chest before raising it in a greeting to her fans. She then hops down from the ropes, ready to start the match.) John Roe: This match is scheduled for one fall… hailing from Sydney, Australia; at a weight of 136lbs...MOIRA STORM!!! JLT: “Moria seems fired up tonight!” Leah: “Yeah. You know why don’t you?” JLT: “No.” Leah: : “I saw her in the back, and Meggie was explaining the concept of electricity and plumbing to our kangaroo bopper. Now if I’m EVER dumb enough to have Meggie explaining stuff to me, just shoot me.” (The fans rise to their feet with cheers and whistles as the cameras now move to the view of the entrance ramp as Fighting over Me plays loudly over the PA system. Various model shoot captures are shown over the video screen of KibbyD as they then move on to show her and her dog Daisy also. Some in ring action captures of her wrestling.) (KibbyD steps from behind the stage curtains wearing Daisy Dukes bottoms a Plaid Halter top some Cowgirl boots and Elbow pads. She flips her long blonde hair with her left hand as she holds her dog Daisy with her right hand. The ditzy KibbyD blows kisses to the fans and begins to walk down the ramp while tagging the fans of her hands along the way. When she reaches the ring she slowly walks up the steel ring steps and makes her way onto the ring apron. KibbyD holds onto the ring ropes then swings her hair and very slowly stepping under the middle rope. KibbyD then prances around the ring blowing kiss and then exit the ring to hand Daisy over to the timerkeeper and enter back into the ring and awaits her opponent.) John Roe: and her opponent from Houston, Texas weighing 120lbs Kibby D! Leah: “Thank god, she didn’t ask for a microphone.” (Kibby and Moria face one another in the center of the ring. Moria seems to be taking offense at something, and Kibby is smiling. All at once Moria whales on Kibby with a hard left, and Kibby returns fire. Kibby tries to get the upper hand by going for an eye rake but Moria manages to get in a quick knee to the gut and follows it up with a DDT.) JLT: “I wonder what Moria was so upset about?” Leah: “I know. She heard her singing in the back.” Gwen Stafani’s Hollaback girl rythym. “Cause I aint no Outa back mirror” (Moria brings Kibby to her feet as the two begin exchanging blows once again this time Kibs manages to get the upper hand with a sharp elbow shot to the side of the aussie’s head then quickly nails a belly to belly release suplex.) Leah: “Someone’s getting busted open! I can feel it!” (Kibby continues the attack as she stomps down on the fallen Moria and then begins to drop several knees to her chest. Kibby picks Moria up to her feet and whips her against the ropes, Kibby goes for a clothesline but Moria ducks under, Kibby bounces back and hits a flying forearm smash but Moria isn’t knocked off her feet. She stumbles back a few steps. Kibby looks shocked and bounces herself looking for another clothesline but Moria manages to pull out a spine buster and plants Kibby hard.) JLT: “How did she keep from going down with that shot?” Leah: : “I’m sure she’s sparred with the wallaby. They are quite adept at staying on their feet during matches.” JLT: “Since when does a Wallaby wrestle?” Leah: : “Since Moria signed a Diva’s Unleashed contract.” [Moria pulls Kibby to her feet, and whips her to the corner. Kibby hit’s the turnbuckle hard, and falls face first on the mat. Moria begins browbeating Kibby, then turns to the crowd to signal for her finisher. Kibby nips to her feet, and tries for a full release German suplex but with the release Moria manages to flip her body and land on her feet. Moria comes looking for a clothesline but Kibby ducks under and nails a brutal dropkick kick.] Levy: “I saw a tooth fly out...Oh man I just saw one of Moria’s teeth come out.” JLT: “I’m sure it was just spit, settle down Leah.” (Kibby pulls Moria to her feet and begins smacking her around. She whips Moria into the nearest turnbuckle and follows up with a standing drop kick which causes her to stumble forward. Kibby comes charging in but Moria trips him up with a drop toe hold. She quickly rolls up, pulls Kibby to her feet and nails her with an Australian Supplex! Moria keeps the bridge while the referee begins the count.) 1.… JLT: “That hurt!” 2.… (Kibby is down but she reaches out and grabs a hold of the bottom rope. Moria breaks the hold and backs away from Kibby as she slowly gets to her feet by pulling himself up with the ropes. Kibby is standing on her feet leaned up against the ropes as Moria comes in looking to lock him up in a abdominal stretch but Kibby manages to out muscle Moria and counter it being able to lock her in a pumphandle slam. Kibby in desperation covers.) 1 . . . 2 . . KICKOUT JLT: “Oh my! She actually kicked out, this one isn’t over yet folks.” (Kibby rolls over on her back as she starts to pound the ring in anger. She then picks Moria up and delivers a few shots to the head before whipping her into the ropes and catching her with a clothesline. Moria gets back up to her feet and Kibby bounces herself of the ropes but Moria grabs a hold and drops Kibby with a Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.) Leah: “Her spine is broken! No more singing and dancing!” (Moria shrugs off the pin, and climbs up the nearest turnbuckle looking for a high risk move but Kibby leaps to her feet and knocks Moria’s legs out from under her landing hard on the turnbuckle. Moria is completely dazed, and Kibby runs up the ropes and nails Moria with a top rope RODEO!) 1 . . . 2 . . . 3 John Roe: Her is your winner…KibbyD!!! JLT: “She did it?” Leah: “I’ll bet she will write a song about it.” (Cameras cut to break.) [Kibby walks down the hallways, hot from her match with Moria, she is walking backstage with her little doggie Daze. She then bumps into angry Tequila who has her head up in smokes as she nudges Kibby on her shoulder. She then points her finger at Kibby as she screams at her.] Tequila: You little Bitch…I should have you fired! I know you were in my Man’s office showing off your…your…Goodies. [Kibby mouth drops in a playful motion as she then covers her mouth as she giggles.] Kibby: Wow…he loved it so much he just had to tell the whole world right? Tequila: Shut Up! Shut Up right now…you know what you better watch your back because I will… [Kibby then cuts her office.] Kibby: Stop running your mouth your fake bleach blonde. I could not even compare to the sexual fantasies you give Shane. Then again I’m not a slut like you either…so do me a favor get out of my way. [Kibby pushes her out of the way as she continues to trail down the hall. Tequila gives a evil stare her way thinking of ways she could that the New Bitch in Town down. The scene then moves else where.] Tag Team Match Blonde Ambition vs. Les Mannequins & Lethal Dosage JLT: Next up we have a little rarity in Divas Unleashed as we have an eight-woman tag team match! Blonde Ambition, with new member Meggie, will take on the tag champions Lethal Dosage and the Latrisha-guided Les Mannequins up next! Leah: Avery still scares me. JLT: This should be interesting, there’s so many women, it could all end in chaos, and it probably will knowing DU! Leah: I guess I have to support Les Mannequins for once considering they’re teaming with my sistahs Cherrie and Crystal! JLT: I’m not surprised. [The sounds of “Barbie Girl” by Aqua hits the PA system as Blonde Ambition skip out from the back wearing cheerleading outfits with bright pink pom-poms in head. Mistress walks to the first, holding a megaphone in her hand and dressed in a black tracksuit. She blows a whistle and then raises the megaphone to her lips.] Mistress: She’s keen, she ain’t mean, she’s the cutest thing you’ve ever seen! GOOOOOO CARLEY! [Carley giggles and leaps up and down on the spot, she flings her pom-poms around as the fans cheer her.] Mistress: We love her a bunch, she’s the master of the crunch, I’d like to meet her for lunch! GOOOOO COURTNEY! [Courtney giggles and dances forward, she does a backflip on the stage as the fans cheer her and blows them a kiss.] Mistress: She’s got more than one fan, you know she can, she’s got the bestest tan! GOOOOOOO MEGGIE! [Meggie twirls with her pom-poms, shaking her body as she dances to the song, she turns to the crowd and slaps her ass and winks.] Mistress: She’s sweet, she’s neat, she’s not a piece of meat! GOOOOOO LILY! [Lily dances with her pom-poms, raising them in the air and kicks her leg up high into the air like a proper cheerleader. Courtney then steps forward as the other Blonde Ambition members hoist her onto her shoulders, Courtney sits on them and strikes a pose, bringing the megaphone to her lips.] Courtney: Ready? OK! Give me a B…L…O…N…D…E! [The crowd chant along, shouting the letters back.] Courtney: What does that spell? BLONDE! [Courtney then applauds as Carley switches places with her and Carley sits on top of the shoulders of Meggie and Lily, Carley giggles into the microphone and begins her own chant, shouting the letters.] Carley: YAY! Give me a A…M…B…I…S…H…O…N! [Meggie and Lily frown and look at each other.] Carley: What does that spell? [The crowd murmurs for a minute, trying to figure it out what it does spell but Carley is oblivious and shouts the word with a huge amount of joy.] Carley: AMBITION! [Carley giggles and jumps down from her position as Blonde Ambition begin to skip down to the ring, teasing the fans in the front rows by shaking their pom-poms in their faces. They skip around the ring, Meggie dances on the apron and tosses each of her pink pom-poms into the audience.] JLT: What an entrance! [The Dirty Inc. logo is seen up on the screen as smoke billows. "Fuck Ya Man" by Tila Tequila begins to play, and the lights at the top of the ramp blink in correlation to the beat. Avery and Envy walk out together, with their hands on their hips, and stop near the entrance. They give each other a quick glance, nod their heads and begin walking down the ramp in near robotic unison. Avery slides underneath the bottom rope as Envy hops up on the apron and steps between the ropes. Avery runs over to the corner and jumps up on the second turnbuckle, raising her arms in the air. Envy goes to her own respective corner and does the same. They jump down from the turnbuckles together, and then join one another, awaiting their competition.] John Roe: Their opponents, first, at a combined weight of 242lbs, accompanied to the ring by Latrisha Lamarte, they are Avery and Envy...LES MANNEQUINS!!! [All of a sudden “Roses” by Outkast starts playing all over the Pa system. All of sudden two spot lights are pointed at the entrance way. Crystal emerges through the curtains and is greeted by multiple pyros that start shooting off one by one. Crystal struts out from backstage, with a rose in her hand a smile on her face, she hands the rose to an audience member as she makes her wya down the ramp, several steps behind her is Cherrie Hilton, who looks annoyed at walking out to her sisters music. Crystal hands out another rose to a kid in the front row as Cherrie slides into the ring, ready to start the match.] John Roe: And their partners, they are the reigning DU Tag Team Champions, Cherrie and Crystal Hilton...LETHAL DOSAGE!!! [Crystal slides into the ring and nods at Cherrie, they then both run towards the corner Blonde Ambition stand in but Crystal stops running and walks to her corner, abandoning her sister and leaving Cherrie hurling towards a 4-on-1 situation. Cherrie nails Carley from behind, knocking her into the mat but Meggie and Lily immediately begin to double team her, nailing Cherrie in the face with punches.] JLT: Crystal just sent Cherrie into the lion’s den there! Leah: There are no lions, what are you talking about? [Avery and Envy stand looking on as Latrisha yells at them to get on the apron, as they do. Meggie and Cherrie then start out the match as the referee calls for the bell, Meggie stomps on Cherrie. Meggie brings Cherrie to her feet and whips her to the ropes but Cherrie counters and leaps into the air, taking Meggie down into the canvas with a flying clothesline.] [Cherrie then heads to her corner, she slaps Crystal across the chest with a chop, tagging her in. Crystal holds her chest and steps into the ring, she approaches Meggie and kicks her in the stomach. Crystal then pulls Meggie into a DDT position but Meggie rolls out and nips behind Crystal, Meggie then leaps into the air and onto Crystal’s shoulders, taking her down into the mat with a reverse hurricanrana.] JLT: Nice move from Meggie, I think she’s settled into Blonde Ambition perfectly. Leah: She’s only been there a week, wait until they stay at a hotel together and you see what a mess she makes in the bathroom with all her fake tan! JLT: Meggie is more than just a tan! [Meggie then rolls to her corner as Courtney leaps up and down for a tag. Meggie tags her in as Courtney excitedly shouts directions at her and climbs to the top rope. Meggie scoops Crystal up and plants her across her knee, ready for a double team move.] [Courtney then signals and leaps from the top rope with a leg drop but with too much speed, she flies over Meggie and lands behind her, crashing butt-first into the mat. Meggie looks confused and looks around but Crystal grabs Meggie’s head and pulls her down into a stunner-esque move.] Leah: Classic, Courtney’s such a dumbass! [Courtney stands, holding her butt from the impact. Crystal approaches her and spins her around, nailing her in the face with forearms. Crystal then whips Courtney into her team’s corner. Crystal follows up with a clothesline to Courtney’s neck and then tags in Avery.] Leah: Here comes the man! JLT: Shhh! Leah: What? Avery makes Chyna look petite! [Latrisha directs traffic as Avery climbs into the ring, fluttering her eyelashes at Courtney. Avery nails Courtney with a knife-edge chop in the corner and grabs her by her head, flipping her into the mat with a snapmare as Courtney lands on her butt, once again. Avery then nails Courtney in the back with a soccer kick which echoes around the arena.] JLT: That had to hurt! Leah: She needs a good kicking! [Avery then tags in her partner Envy, as Les Mannequins step into the ring. Avery scoops Courtney into a sidewalk slam and plants her in the canvas as Envy leaps into the air at the same time, connecting with a leg drop.] [Envy and Avery then smile as Latrisha orders them, standing on the apron. Les Mannequins then bring Courtney to her feet, they both nod to each other and execute a double Russian leg sweep to Courtney, as Envy covers. The referee slides into position to count.] JLT: Les Mannequins nailed the double team, we’ve got a pin! [1] [2] [Tiger Lily breaks up the count.] Leah: Barefoot Barbie broke it up! [Lily turns to leave the ring but Envy is angry and leaps to her feet, running at Lily from behind and nailing her with a dropkick to the back of the head, sending Lily into the mat.] [Envy then turns back to Courtney and tries to bring her to her feet but Courtney breaks the hold and begins to nail Envy in the face with punches. Envy kicks Courtney and whips her to the ropes, Courtney bounces back as Envy tries a sidewalk slam but Courtney reverses it and plants Envy in the canvas with a headscissors take-down.] JLT: A classic counter from Courtney! Leah: Classic? There’s nothing funny about the Monroes, they’re as funny as SNL! And that’s saying something! JLT: Whatever, Courtney’s heading to her corner! [Courtney then tags in Meggie, who climbs to the top rope. Courtney calls Lily over as Envy stands, holding her head. Courtney and Lily then duck and sweep the legs of Envy and at the same time, Meggie leaps with a cross body from the top rope, and Blonde Ambition taking down Envy with a triple team.] JLT: Great move from BA! Leah: The Tan Monster has a pin! [Meggie quickly covers.] [1] [2] [Cherrie Hilton interrupts the count.] Leah: That’s my girl! [Meggie looks angry and stands, she shoves Cherrie but Cherrie shoves her back. The referee then begins to separate them from each other, ushering Cherrie back to her corner but Latrisha Lamarte slides into the ring from behind, she grabs Meggie into a sleeper hold before dropping her on her head into the mat. Latrisha then pulls Envy onto a cover.] JLT: What is Latrisha doing?! She can’t do that! Leah: She just did? [The referee turns around to count but Carley Monroe runs into the ring, she approaches Latrisha who stands smugly on the outside and leaps over the top rope, connecting to her with a somersault splash, taking the manager down into the padded floor. Carley then leaps up and dances, the referee counts.] JLT: Carley went airborne there! Leah: The referee’s got a cover in the ring! [1] [2] [Meggie gets her shoulder up.] Leah: Damn it! JLT: I bet Meggie’s keen to impress her fellow teammates tonight, she’s going to try her best to win this match! Leah: You know how Meggie could impress her friends? She could take them back to her house and serve them cocktails. Oh wait, you can’t do that when you live in THE SUN! [Envy climbs to her feet, Crystal holds her hand out for a tag but Envy ignores her and heads to Avery, tagging her in. Crystal looks annoyed as Avery and Envy both smile, they approach Meggie but Meggie suddenly leaps into the air with a spinning heel kick, connecting to both Mannequins and knocking them down into the mat.] [Carley Monroe slides back into the ring, Carley shakes her ass as Meggie joins her. Les Mannequins find their feet and hold their heads, they frown at the dancing. Carley and Meggie then turn to face the Mannequins but Avery and Envy connect to them in the face with a double big boot, knocking them down to the mat.] JLT: Les Mannequins have the power in this match, I think they could be good challengers for Lethal Dosage! Leah: Ugh, sexism. JLT: What? Leah: Shhh, I’m trying to watch the match! [Avery and Envy then head to the ropes to check on Latrisha, who is climbing to her feet when Crystal Hilton tags herself into the mat. Crystal then shouts directions at Cherrie, Cherrie nods and climbs into the ring. Crystal grabs Carley and drags her into position at the corner.] [Crystal climbs to the top rope, signaling for her finisher. Crystal then signals to the fans and leaps forward with a 450 splash “Rose Whip” but Cherrie suddenly drags Carley out of harms way and Crystal slams into the canvas. Cherrie then looks ‘shocked’ and walks back to her corner.] JLT: Now that was classic! Leah: What the hell?! [Meggie then approaches her corner and tags in Tiger Lily, Lily hops into the ring as Crystal holds her face and climbs to her feet. Lily and Crystal run towards each other and exchange punches. Crystal gets the advantage and ducks one of Lily’s swings, Crystal steps behind Lily as Lily spins around, Crystal swings with a chick kick but Lily catches Crystal’s leg.] [Lily then pulls Crystal towards her and lifts her into a sit-down powerbomb, planting her in the canvas. Lily then stands and looks to be going for a cover but suddenly Cherrie Hilton nails her from behind, knocking her into the canvas. Meggie comes to Lily’s defense, running into the ring and grabbing Cherrie by her hair and yanking her down into the canvas. Meggie then nails Cherrie in the face with a barrage of left and rights.] JLT: They’re all coming to each other’s defense! [Les Mannequins regroup and charge towards Meggie, they yank her off and begin to stomp onto her but the Monroes head into the ring. Carley and Courtney then strike superhero poses and climb to the top ropes on either side of the ring, they fly through the air and nail Avery and Envy with hurricanranas, taking them down into the canvas.] Leah: Carley and Courtney need to stick to dancing and getting beaten up! Come on my Hiltons, they’ll win this, mark my words! [Cherrie comes from behind to Meggie but Meggie nails a stunner as Cherrie falls to the canvas, Meggie then calls out to Lily and points to the top rope. Lily and Meggie then head to the top rope, Avery and Envy roll to their feet as Carley and Courtney nail them with kicks to the guts.] [Carley ducks behind Envy and pulls her into a “Meanie Mangler” back cracker as Courtney hoists Avery up into a “Courtney Crunch” widow’s peak, and at the same time as that, Meggie and Lily both jump from the top rope with their high flying finishers, a 450 splash “Summer Lovin’” and a sky twister press “Angel’s Dust”, all executing their moves beautifully.] JLT: Whoa! Did you see that? That was awesome! Leah: Meh, it was so-so! Booooo! [The referee stands confused, holding his head as all four members of Blonde Ambition roll over their opponents and cover them, hooking the leg. The referee shrugs and drops to the canvas, he counts all four pins.] JLT: They all have a cover! [1] [2] [3] John Roe: Here are your winners…BLONDE AMBITION!!! JLT: Blonde Ambition win! Leah: Damn it! [The sounds of “Barbie Girl” fill the arena as Blonde Ambition all stand and raise their arms in the air, they then begin to dance to their song, as Meggie shakes her ass for the fans and Mistress climbs into the ring, with her megaphone still in hand. Carley and Courtney both do cheerleader style dances as Lily smiles on.] JLT: Blonde Ambition picked up a victory tonight, I guess recruiting Meggie was a good idea after all? Leah: I want to know who the hell let them use this awful song for their entrance music! It’s destroying my ears! Rockford State Championship Match Felicity vs. Katima COMING SOON Brought to you by Rockstar Entertainments Epilogue Thanks to Karlee, Kibby, Korith, Mike, Meggie, Paul, Robert, Travis and anyone else for contributing to the show! Sorry that certain matches are 'coming soon' but I explained in the email I send out, I just ran out of time and it takes a lot of energy to write these shows, and I just didn't have the combination of the two, so sorry about that. Hopefully the 'coming soons' will be filled in soon, it's nothing personal which matches were left out, sorry if yours was. Anyways, I hoped you all enjoyed the show! Thank you for reading! -Card Subject to Change-