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Sunday 30th October 2005
[We fade in backstage to see Sexy Amanda, Heather Burnside and Shayla Walker all in their dressing room. Heather Burnside is watching a video which shows Katrina and Valeria Sanchez in a ladder match from 2004. Amanda stares at Shayla who is stretching her legs, Shayla frowns.]
Shayla Walker: What?
Sexy Amanda: You know what.
Shayla Walker: No, I don’t.
Sexy Amanda: You have to win tonight. We need a hatrick, the Body Shop are going to win the tag team belts, you need to retain your belt. Don’t lose it on the first defense Shayla. Don’t.
Shayla Walker: I don’t plan to.
Sexy Amanda: Good.
Shayla Walker: Hey, what about you? You might lose your match against the Accomplishments. Don’t talk to me like that when you’re the one who doesn’t even have a belt!
[Heather laughs and turns to face Shayla.]
Heather Burnside: Shayla dear, I’m a legendary tag team wrestler. If anyone is going to win those belts it’s me, and to be honest, we’ve already beaten them. I already organized a party to celebrate our victory.
Shayla Walker: You’re that confident?
Heather Burnside: Yes.
Shayla Walker: Fine.
[Heather raises her eyebrows and looks at Amanda who shrugs, Heather then turns her back on Shayla and begins to discuss strategy with her partner. Shayla sighs and looks at the ceiling of the locker room.]
[We cut into the parking lot and see Krysta Taylor sitting bored and playing with her nails on a railing. In the distance a limousine pulls into the Air Canada Center, the vehicle comes to a halt. The door opens and out steps two pair of legs in jeans, followed by two feet in Armani shoes. The camera pans upwards to reveal Felicity and Shane Rockford stepping out of the vehicle, Shane hands the driver a tip.]
[He then puts his arm around Felicity and walks her into the ring, Krysta glances up and her eyes widen. She leaps off her railing and grabs her microphone, playing with her hair as she runs towards Shane and Felicity.]
Krysta Taylor: Felicity and Shane! You’re together?!
[Felicity ignores Krysta and the couple continue to walk into the arena.]
Krysta Taylor: Hello? Are you together?!
[Felicity gives Krysta a dirty look and rolls her eyes and keeps walking.]
Krysta Taylor: Felicity! You look so fat!
[Felicity stops and snaps her head to face Krysta, Krysta smiles and winks, Felicity snatches the microphone from her and addresses the slutty interviewer.]
Felicity: I am not Madonna, I’m not Gwyneth, I’m not Elizabeth Hurley, I’m not Kate Hudson, I’m not a Sugababe, and I’m definitely not Posh Spice. I only had my baby three weeks ago and you call me fat?!
[Felicity then glances at her microphone and hits Krysta over the head with her as she falls to the floor clutching her platinum hair, Felicity chucks the microphone onto Krysta and steps over her, entering the arena.]
JLT: Shane and Felicity are here? What did she mean by naming all those celebrities?
Leah: I think those are all women who dropped their baby weight really fast. I see you’re still carrying a bit of yours though Jamie.
JLT: I’ve never had children?
Leah: Oh, well, oops.
Askai Championship "House of Horrors" Match
JLT: Next up we have one of the most anticipated matches on the card, a rematch between Dame Barbara and Shayla Walker for the Askai Championship.
Leah: Barbara joined DU after she lost her Askai Championship to Shayla Walker and she’s made it clear that she wants it back, and she claims that she “let” Shayla win out of the goodness of her heart. I’m sure I believe that.
JLT: Neither do I, Shayla Walker wants to prove herself tonight and this should be a fun match as it’s a “House of Horrors” match, a DU first!
Leah: There will be a boxes over the ring in overhead wires and they could contain weapons or special surprises, plus there’s also controversy of whether Barbara is the correct weight! She refuses to tell us!
JLT: That’s true, she may be illegal for all we know.
[“My Sacrifice” by Creed hits the PA system as Barbara is escorted to the ring by phenomenal her wrestling mother-in-law, the 81 year old ‘Ma‘ Tabitha Windsor. She comes out wearing a sequined white and gold robe with Dame across the back, stands at the entrance way, looks around the arena. Then Ma Tabitha raises her hand as golden rain falls from above. She saunters to the ring and climbs through the second rope.]
John Roe: The following contest is a "House of Horrors" match for the Askai Championship! Introducing the challenger, from Workington, Cumbria, England, at a weight she will not disclose, to be accompanied by Tabitha Windsor...DAME BARBARA!!!
["Cannonball" by Five Iron Frenzy plays as smoke pours out of vents in the entrance. Blue laser lights shine in the entrance to the arena and Shayla appears in the middle of the laser lights and walks down to the ring. High fiving all of her fans near the guardrails.]
John Roe: Her opponent, from Barberton, Ohio, at a weight of 112lbs, the Askai Champion...SHAYLA WALKER!!!
[Both women stand across each other from the ring and glance up at the boxes. There’s eight in total, and they have all bats imprinted on them. They hover over the ring as the referee calls for the bell, both women approach each other and Barbara looks down her nose at Shayla, Barbara then slaps Shayla across the face and Shayla fires back with a barrage of punches. Barbara whips Shayla to the ropes and catches in her into a sidewalk slam planting her on the canvas.]
[Barbara then bounces to the ropes and nails an elbow drop to Shayla, Barbara stomps on Shayla as she climbs to her feet. Barbara then comes from behind to Shayla and tosses her over the top rope to the outside of the ring. Tabitha Windsor then pulls out a stick from underneath the ring with a hook on the end, she hands it to Barbara. Barbara then begins to tap at one of the boxes and manages to get in the hook in place and open the box. A chain falls from the box and lands in the centre of the ring as Barbara smiles.]
[Shayla Walker climbs on to the apron as Barbara picks up the chain, Shayla leans back on the ropes and leaps into the ring with a missile dropkick sending Barbara to her feet. Shayla then kicks Barbara out of the ring to the outside. Shayla then bounces to the ropes as Barbara finds her feet on the outside, Shayla leaps over the top rope with a flying somersault dive.]
JLT: Go Shayla! She’s really putting it Barbara, she has a point to prove.
Leah: Barbara is 100 years old and Shayla is only 16!
[Shayla then slides into the ring and picks up the stick Barbara left to open to the boxes. Shayla raises it up and tugs on one of the mystery boxes, it finally opens and spiders drop out and land on Shayla’s head. Shayla screams and drops to the canvas, clawing at her body trying to get them off her.]
JLT: Spiders!
Leah: Nasty!
[Barbara stands on the outside and smiles, Shayla frantically brushes her hair trying to shake the spiders off, Barbara slides into the ring and catches Shayla in a diamond cutter move, slamming her head into the canvas. Barbara then covers, putting her two feet on the second rope. The referee counts.]
[1]
[2]
[Shayla kicks out.]
[Barbara pulls Shayla off and slams her into the corner, Barbara picks up the chain and wraps it around her fist. She then heads to Shayla and climbs up, Barbara then starts to use a 10 punch on Shayla, using her chain-clad fist. Shayla counters however, but shoving Barbara backwards into the ring. Barbara lands on her feet and runs towards Shayla but Shayla pulls herself up on the turnbuckle and nails a dropkick to Barbara.]
JLT: What a counter!
Leah: Shayla does have more energy!
[Barbara stumbles backwards and Shayla comes from behind her with a diamond cutter of her own. Shayla then takes the chain off of Barbara’s wrap and wraps it around her neck, Shayla pulls on the chain backwards choking Barbara. The referee tells Shayla to release the hold and the champion does, Shayla picks up the stick and begins to ram it into a box. The box opens and a can of red hair sprays falls to the ring canvas, Shayla frowns as she picks it up.]
JLT: Red hair spray? What are they going to use that for?
Leah: I think we’re about to find out!
[Barbara then climbs her feet, she runs at Shayla from behind but Shayla turns around with the spray in hand and sprays Barbara in the eyes, Barbara falls backwards to the floor and claws at her eyes, which know have red paint on them. Shayla then brings Barbara to her feet and knees her in the mid-section, Shayla bounces to the ropes and nails her sunset flip “Sunset Whirl” finisher, bring Barbara into a cover.]
JLT: This is it! Shayla’s going to retain!
[1]
[2]
[Barbara kicks out.]
JLT: That was close! It was almost over there!
Leah: Barbara hangs on, like the dinosaur she is.
[Shayla finds her feet and brings Barbara with her, Shayla nails a few tough shots to Barbara’s face sending her down to the canvas. Shayla then turns and climbs onto the top turnbuckle, Barbara gets to her feet as Shayla leaps off with a hurricanrana to Barbara.]
[Barbara bounces to the floor and rolls back up to her feet, Shayla runs at her with an attempted clothesline but Barbara counters instead by ducking and applying a full nelson slam to Shayla. Barbara then picks up the stick to open the boxes and tugs on the door of one, it opens and green goo sludge flies down and hits Barbara in the face.]
Leah: Hahaha!
JLT: That’s got to be a surprise for Barbara! She’s covered in green stuff!
[Barbara wipes the sticky liquid from her eyes and shakes her head, Shayla gets to her feet and climbs to the top rope. Barbara then turns around as Shayla leaps from the top rope with a flying DDT, driving Barbara into the canvas. Shayla then climbs on to a cover on the legendary British diva. The referee gets in position to count.]
[1]
[2]
[Barbara gets her foot on the bottom rope.]
Leah: Barbara knows the ring so well!
JLT: She has spent most of her adult life wrestling you know!
[Shayla gets up in frustration and picks up the stick to undo another box, like fishing ducks from a pool. She then taps a few of them, trying to gauge what’s inside them, she then picks one.]
JLT: Are they even allowed to use that stick?
Leah: I don’t know where it came from.
[Shayla pries open one of the boxes and a 2x4 falls to the ring canvas. She smiles as she picks it up, Barbara gets to her feet and Shayla swings the stick at her. Barbara ducks and nails a superkick to Shayla’s face, knocking the weapon out of her hand and the champion to the floor.]
[Barbara then heads to a turnbuckle and begins to untie the second turnbuckle’s padding. She smiles and tosses the cover to the outside, she brings Shayla to her feet. Barbara whips Shayla into the turnbuckle and Shayla connects hard, Shayla walks forward in pain holding her back. Barbara nails a drop toe hold and climbs on Shayla’s back, applying a regal stretch.]
JLT: Barbara’s locked in her submission! “Dame’s Delight”!
Leah: It could be over if Shayla taps!
[Shayla writches in pain and refuses to give up, she shakes her head no and after a few minutes of pain the referee demands that Barbara break up the count. Barbara does and shoves Shayla’s head forward. Barbara picks up the chain from earlier and ties it around Shayla’s hand in a knot, Barbara then ties the other end to the ropes, handcuffing Shayla.]
JLT: Barbara’s handcuffed the champion!
[Shayla gets to her feet and begins to tug at the rope, but it doesn’t break. Barbara smiles and runs towards her with an attempted shoulder block but Shayla ducks and nails a back body drop sending Barbara up and over, Barbara manages to land on feet on the outside. Shayla then turns around and jumps through the ropes nailing a dropkick to Barbara which snaps the chain as both women fall to the floor.]
[Tabitha Windsor looks on as Shayla rams Barbara’s head into the steel steps, Shayla then attempts to nail a spear into the steps but Barbara moves out of the way and Shayla connects headfirst with them, Barbara then picks up Shayla and rolls her into the ring. Barbara climbs into the ring with her and whips Shayla to the ropes, Barbara then runs to the ropes herself and leaps off with a springboard diamond cutter connecting with Shayla on the rebound.]
JLT: That was Barbara’s “My Fair Lady” finisher!
[Barbara then rolls Shayla over, and places both of her feet on the second rope for a cover, the referee doesn’t see it.]
Leah: Barbara’s cheating!
[1]
[2]
[3]
JLT: She’s done it!
John Roe: Here is your winner and NEW Askai Champion…DAME BARBARA!!!
[Barbara stands up with a smile on her face, she snatches the title belt from the referee and raises it above her head. Tabitha Windsor joins her in the ring and raises Barbara’s hand, Barbara then looks down onto Shayla who lies on the ring canvas.]
[Barbara then helps Shayla up to her feet, Shayla gets ready to fight but Barbara extends her hand in a handshake. Shayla shakes her hand and then Barbara raises Shayla’s hand too.]
JLT: Aww, it looks like a mark of respect between these two women!
Leah: I know, they should get a room!
[Barbara then talks to Shayla as she walks out of the ring to the sounds of creed, the trio leave the ring and Barbara continues to congratulate Shayla on a good match.]
JLT: We have a brand new Askai Champion! The second new champion of the night! Well done Barbara!
Leah: Who knew dinosaurs were capable of putting on good wrestling matches?
[We cut backstage to see Tequila sitting in her office, with Holly Wentz behind the desk and scribbling on a stack of papers. Tequila runs a hand through her hair and is dressed in a very slutty outfit with bunny ears. She smiles to herself, there is a knock at the door and it’s pushed open by Felicity and Shane Rockford. Tequila leaps off her desk and stares at the couple with her mouth gaping open. Felicity smiles.]
Shane Rockford: What are you doing in my office?
Tequila: I had to take over while you decided to disappear, what the hell is she doing her?
Shane Rockford: Don’t talk to her like that.
Tequila: She’s a slut isn’t she?
Shane Rockford: You’re a bigger slut than she is.
[Tequila gasps and looks offended, Felicity looks up at Shane.]
Shane Rockford: Now, get out of our office.
[Tequila shakes her head no, as Holly Wentz stands from behind the desk and looks at the floor, trying to avoid the tension. Shane then grabs Tequila by her arm and twists it, sending her to her knees and looking up at him. Felicity then grabs her by her hair, Shane opens the door and Felicity tosses Tequila out of the room. Shane then slams the door behind them and then puts a key in the lock and turns it, locking the door.]
[On the outside of the room, Tequila hammers on the door with her fists, shouting and screaming. She then picks up a chair and begins to slam it against the door, trying to gain entry. Ciara Demillo walks up the corridor, dressed in her ring attire and laughs at Tequila. Tequila looks at her.]
Tequila: What are you laughing at?
Ciara Demillo: Nothing. You need to chill out, I was coming to talk to you actually. I wanted to tell you to start having my name engraved on the Unleashed championship, in a few hours time that belt will be around my waist and heading with me back to Princess Town.
Tequila: You shouldn’t be so confident Ciara. You should be prepared for the unexpected tonight.
[Ciara frowns as Tequila storms off in the opposite direction, Ciara then looks at the dent marks in the door and chuckles to herself.]
[We see Bloo, Jinx and Trixie backstage. Bloo and Jinx have both taken off their Ninja masks but the rest of their leather outfit clings to their bodies, Trixie is making small talk with them when Icenique interrupts them from behind. Icenique has her Unleashed Championship slung across her shoulder.]
Icenique: Hey girls.
[The trio turn around and face Icenique, Trixie smiles.]
Icenique: What’s up?
Trixie: Oh nothing much. We’re just relaxing, enjoying Halloween. It’s our favourite holiday of the year.
Icenique: That’s tight. I just came over here to compliment Jinx on that purple mist, and Bloo on her blue mist, those moves are awesome.
Jinx: Thanks, I could show you if you want?
Icenique: Nah, I’ve got my own arsenal. I’ma punk that Ciara bitch.
Bloo: I hope you do. We don’t like her, I hope you win tonight. She cost me a ladder match and 250k, she deserves to get her ass kicked for that!
Icenique: Aight, I’ll give her one for you. See you guys later.
[Icenique walks on with a smile on her face, Bloo and Jinx go back to discussing horror movies. The camera then cuts to see Icenique talking to the referee further along the corridor. We cut back to ringside.]
JLT: It looks like Icenique is pretty popular.
Leah: I don’t like her. She’s too J-Lo for me.
JLT: Wouldn’t that be I-Que?
Leah: That’s even worse, plus she’s hanging around with lesbians, that is so cliché.
-World Tour Vignette-
Tag Team Championship Match
JLT: Next up we have Katrina and Kristin Wallace-Hudson defending their Tag Team Championships against the Body Shop. This all started a very long time ago when Katrina and Amanda engaged in an altercation before their match backstage.
Leah: Add shredding all of Kristin’s wardrobe to the mix and sooner than we knew it Kristin was announcing that she and Katrina were the new champions! Amanda earned the right to this match at “Drop Dead Gorgeous” last month and here we are!
JLT: That’s right, Amanda had to fine a new partner too and she did that in the form of 3WL’s Heather Burnside.
Leah: Kristin isn’t a proper wrestler too, she’s only a manager. Her ring skills are pretty limited, so I can’t wait to see how she fairs tonight!
[The theme from Full Metal Alchemist hits the PA system as Sexy Amanda walks out in her golden bikini, and next to her stands Heather Burnside in a silver one. They smile at each other and begin to walk down to the ring.]
John Roe: The following contest is a tag team match for the Tag Team Championship, introducing the challenges, from Ohio and England respectively, Heather Burnside and Sexy Amanda...THE BODY SHOP!!!
["Money, Power, Respect" by Lil Kim hits the PA system as Kristin Wallace-Hudson and Katrina walk out onto the stage with their championships around their waist. Katrina is wearing her usual attire while Kristin has black boots, a black top and black bottoms. Oliver Hudson walks behind them as Kristin parades her championship.]
John Roe: Their opponents; from New York City, New York, to be accompanied to the ring by Oliver Hudson, the current Tag Team Champions, Katrina and Kristin Wallace-Hudson...THE ACCOMPLISHMENTS!!!
[Katrina stands in the ring as Kristin exits onto the apron, Oliver blows her a kiss of good luck from ringside and she smiles. Amanda and Heather discuss whose going to start the match and decide on Heather. Heather and Katrina head to the centre of the ring, Heather then shoves Katrina. Katrina stumbles backwards and bounces to the ropes, Katrina nails an elbow to Heather’s face sending her down to the canvas.]
[Katrina scrambles and straddles Heather, lifting her head up and nailing shots to her ginger head. Katrina then brings Heather to her feet and slams her into the corner, Katrina then nails a few kicks to Heather’s mid-section.]
[Katrina brings Heather into a bulldog and runs to the centre of the ring and plants Heather in the canvas. Katrina then gets to her feet and allows Heather to make the tag to Amanda. Amanda climbs into the ring and begins to run towards Katrina, Katrina swings with a clothesline but Amanda ducks and nails her with a Russian leg sweep.]
[Amanda brings Katrina to her feet and whips her to the ropes, Amanda leapfrogs over the Queen of Pain as she flies across the ring. Amanda then nails a spinebuster to Katrina and hooks one leg for the cover.]
[1]
[2]
[Katrina kicks out.]
[Amanda gets to her feet and brings Katrina with her, Amanda nails Katrina in the face a few times before pulling her in for a powerbomb move. Amanda hoists Katrina up but Katrina reverses it into a DDT driving Amanda facefirst into the mat. Both women find their feet, Katrina whips Amanda to the ropes but Amanda counters by hanging on to the them. Katrina runs towards Amanda but Amanda counters with a back body drop sending Katrina tumbling to the outside of the ring.]
[Amanda then waits for a few seconds before she pulls back on the ropes and springs herself over the top, connecting with a splash which sends both women down to the floor.]
JLT: Amanda taking out Katrina with high-risk, this match has been pretty even so far, although Kristin has yet to be involved!
Leah: I think she’ll just stand on the apron and look pretty the whole match. That’s probably their plan.
JLT: It’s a smart one.
[Heather Burnside climbs into the ring, as Katrina and Amanda find their feet on the outside. Heather leans back on the ropes and leaps over with a somersault splash taking all three women out on the outside of the ring. Kristin then looks at all three women as they try to find their feet, Kristin then smiles to herself and climbs onto the top turnbuckle.]
[All three women find their feet on the outside and exchange punches, Kristin positions herself on the top turnbuckle and leaps off with a cross body to all three women, and the two teams all floor to the floor in carnage.]
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